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Winesburg

by Winesburg

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1.
If I were a wiser man I'd know the depth of my abyss and could have caught myself before I sank so deeply into it. If I were an honest man I might see through my own facade until I find the truths I've desperately hidden from myself. If I were a humble man I wouldn't be so blind when looking at the light that I put myself in, because I was fire and lightning, I was gonna change the world, I was a model citizen, the proud man before his fall. I'm sorry for everything that I've done wrong.
2.
There was a car graveyard on a small town farm in Mississippi with a couple of old burned out classic cars, and when I was a kid I would walk on by and swear that if you just took the time you could fix one up and drive back to the '50s. But now it's just an aggregate of metal frames all rusted shut and these doors don't open anymore. It's been a long time since I walked these streets or breathed this air that tastes so sweet. It's been a long time since I called my hometown home. She's a long dirt road and a tuneful breeze softer than the night, unaccompanied; that's the melody I remember best. She's that hard time heartland bluegrass blue note swimming through the pine tree country, Dixie-land's pax romana. But now it's just an aggregate of metal frames all rusted shut, a beautiful tribute to herself; sometimes she's bittersweet, sometimes a pedal tone that keeps me on my feet or nostalgia when I'm breathing deep. And all the old men line up at the antique car show 'cuz it's nice to look back once in a while, and time has a funny way of making everything older, but it's nice to look back once in a while, and if you see me glancing backwards, I'm no pillar of salt, it's just nice to look back once in a while.
3.
Olympus Mons 03:44
If I were the sun, I would look out at the Earth and all the other satellites that gravitate in my direction, and then I'd fill the void of darkness with a piercing beam of light and look out at the highest mountaintops and I would sing: "Oh, Olympus Mons, you are the tallest mountain anywhere, you command the very face of the world you sit upon. Great Olympus Mons, there is nothing to wear you down, no tectonic plates, no atmosphere, no rivers to be found, yet you are dust, and to dust you shall return." God, he became dirt so he could show us where to put our feet as they tread for a short while upon the crust of the earth, and the tallest man alive, his stature someday soon shall be cut down and the penitent man remembers as he looks to his feet that we are his and to him we shall return. Oh, Olympus Mons you are the tallest mountain anywhere you command the very face of the world you sit upon.
4.
Desdemona 04:16
Hold me now as I try to be a good man, because I don't even know what that looks like anymore. My shirt and tie were only austere at best, and what a flimsy house we've made for ourselves. Hold me now as I give up all my virtues because they never really were mine in the first place. All the books I've read have taught me justice at best, and what a flimsy world we've made for ourselves. But you, you're the first page of Lolita and I, I'll give my tangled thorns up to you. Hallelujah, I can't do it alone. Hold me now as I try to give myself up because I was never worth believing in to begin with. My code of honor, oh, I sure tried my best. But what flimsy gods we make for ourselves. And you, you're the first page of Lolita and I, I'll give my tangled thorns up to you. Hallelujah, I can't do it alone. And you, you're my sweetest Desdemona and I, I'm in a jealous rage before you. God help me, I can't do it alone.
5.
When I catch my face in the rearview mirror the skin's a little tighter around the eyes: a face more worn out that still remembers when rain fell a little softer in the night, and the moon was a little brighter, the nights were more clear. Like a boat that's tethered to a nearby shore won't you cut me a deal and turn it loose? Or won't you cut me a deal, put things back like before when I knew all the people that I knew? Now that gulf's a little wider, the waters are less clear. Sometimes, you look back and grow wise, and sometimes the years still go by and you've just grown older. Like a painted ship on a shfiting sea like Sisyphus with my taillights to the dawn, maybe everything's a cycle; I keep my eyes straight ahead. In the rearview mirror, it's all the same. Maybe everything's a cycle, maybe everything's moving on. Sometimes, you look back and grow wise, and sometimes the years still go by and you've just grown older. Maybe everything's a cycle Maybe everything works out Maybe everything will stay where it's supposed to, someday.
6.
Remember when We were walking through the woods? Talking like it would only be The first night like this we'd be together Did you know that I would love you? When you told me about Your favorite jokes and favorite colors And we laughed at one another's Awkward attempts at playing it cool Did you know that I would love you? Did you know that I would love you When the rain started falling down And we ran back to the car Holding hands without a sound Holding hands for the very first time? We drove all over town Looking for an umbrella Something to give us shelter 'Cuz we didn't want to part. Oh no, not just yet. Did you know that I would love you? The rain it started coming on That soggy Monday night But you, you were a sight You did your hair a little Bit different way back then. Did you know that I would love you? Did you know that I would love you When all the stores were closed? And I wanted to keep your company Though our clothes were getting soaked? But then we found what we were looking for. And I held on to your hand though that umbrella fell apart, And a lot of things were easier, back then, at the start. That storm, it's kept a-brewing and it's brewing to this day; That storm, it's kept a-brewing, no, it's never gone away. Remember the night We were laying on the hill Electric glow on the horizon Not a star out in the sky That dirty old ditch Felt like a peaceful river When I gave you your first kiss. Did you know that I would love you The first night I said I did? I still do, & I still plan on doing so.
7.
What is the measure of honesty; it seems to me like a yellow leaf that's falling into a sallow sea of green but perhaps a breeze might help it linger for a moment. Do you wonder if we're looking for truth in all the wrong places? Are there curtains that shelter the tenderest parts of yourself? I'm going to Rothko Chapel, where colors bleed into their silky pools. I've learned enough to grow arrogant, just a little bit about a great many things, but the longer I study my own self the more I see an artificial complexity Where I have been right and you have been right and somehow we still disagree. What can be said then of earnest simplicity? So I'm going to Rothko Chapel, where colors bleed into their dusky pools. And I am the shifting sand I built my house upon.
8.
Mountaintops 04:55
In the mire, in the rankest mires of woe, you found me there with a map, but no light to read it by and nowhere to go. There's a glimmer on the horizon; the mountaintop's ablaze. I learned to curse the day I learned to speak for I found no relief. I was dead, I was truly dead. There's a glimmer on the horizon; the mountaintop's ablaze. Then you came and you picked me up. You taught my darkened eyes to see. You gave me life, life I never knew I didn't have; I was chained but now I'm free. I had looked in the mirror to find a king without a kingdom - I was a cripple without a crutch. But you broke your way through all of my illusions and healed my broken bones with love. There's a glimmer on the horizon; the mountaintop's ablaze.
9.
You stood over the ruin of time and showed me the road the road leading out, while I thought back to paths I didn't take so long ago, so long ago. I buried myself in the past like a balm for the onset of age could be found there, but then I found you. You stood by as buildings tumbled down that once stood tall taller than me. And any child could have known you from afar two eyes and a mouth like the man in the moon. And all of the faces and names that I've known have begun to disperse like the sawdust that sits in the cracks of the corners where lives intersect for a time. When the faces and names that I've known fade away and my tower has crumbled and fallen, my life is hidden away and it won't be found around that colossal wreck of the past. Don't look there, don't look there don't look there, it's an empty tomb. Hallelujah, everything will someday be wiped clean. Don't look there, don't look there don't look there, it's all gone. Hallelujah, everything will someday be wiped clean.
10.
Winter Song 04:22
The moon, it shines brightly across the melting snow, and I have been so bold as to think the world could stand transfixed. I've seen love grow stale, felt it choke in my throat. When I came to your bedside, you were halfway gone. It could be a painting, it could be a poem, people crossing themselves as they leave the hospital. Like your frosty breath on these winter nights, there's things you hardly notice until they've left you.
11.
Peace 02:17
There is a flag that flies for peace waving somewhere in the heavens. There is a year of jubilee when all our debts will be forgiven. There is a man who speaks his words like the poets sing for their lovers There is a feast prepared for us where once again we will be brothers.

about

All songs written and performed by Winesburg. Additional musicians include Ben Lytle and Jarod Grice.

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released June 14, 2016

(c) 2016 Stormcloud Studio Publishing (ASCAP).
Produced, mixed, mastered by Jon Ladner at Stormcloud Studio in Denton, TX.

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Winesburg Denton, Texas

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